Being a
Teacher
Life as a
teacher should be nice. You are doing well. You are inheriting knowledge to
other people. Hoping that it wills develop day by day. However, I am not happy
with my life as a teacher. This career is not the only option. I chose to be a
teacher. I have imagined myself having a fun teaching and learning session with
my pupils. It is not happening the way I have imagined. I am sucks in teaching.
I could not control my class. My pupils are so noisy. My voice keep rising up,
ensuring that my pupils are in control. Again, I failed.
The truth is that is
the only option for me not to use canned. I was afraid that I could not control
my anger. I am afraid that they will inform their parents. My classroom
management is killing me. Language barrier is murdering me. I keep blaming
their parents. How you could not teach your child our national language. How
you could let teachers to cover up your mistakes? How you could let us sink in
your major responsibilities? I cried every day, mourning my bad situation after
every lesson failed.
My
workloads are loading well. I was unable to breath. I could not take a break.
There were days that I could not even have my lunch. PBS both offline and
online, LINUS for five classes a week. Three Arts classes a week. I am dying.
Negative aura is vibrating every single day. I am not sure anymore whether I
wanted to teach for my entire life. I am not happy with my work. There is no
sincerity. I love my kiddos. Kiddos love me. I just hate the system. I hate how
it was plan. I have no time to plan the real teaching and learning process
except when I was inform that I would be observed.
I rarely
laugh for something good. Maybe I would never laugh until I am done with this
career.
